End of a Journey

With the end of our Communications class, we mark the end of a fantastic journey with our group mates in this semester. We have learned about group communications in class and through this project, we were able to learn first-hand on the importance of maintaining group synergy. To commemorate the end of a journey, I would like to highlight a few experiences that I found interesting from this project.

In the beginning, we were all “new members” and we kept our distance from each other. Discussions were limited to within the realms of our assignment and nothing more. As time passed, we worked together more often and somehow, we developed affection needs. The ice was broken and we started having small personal talks in each session. Soon we learnt the behaviors of each member; we even bet against each other, up to the point when we would estimate the time of each other’s arrival! Towards the end, we developed shared behavioral standards and we sought support from each other, often seeking the senior as our mentor for help. There were times when one of the members weren’t feeling so good and we tried to understand them and give moral support and understanding. Of course there were also times where we felt upset at each other and silently called them a social loafer. Fortunately -and I believe is the best part of all- our small group that consists of 5 people never broke down into smaller units. We shared common ground and appreciated each other equally.

Everybody is probably rejoicing at the arrival of the end of the semester, and in fact I am too, but somehow, I wish that we can still remain working as a group for a longer period of time. I believe that we have evolved from a secondary “comms project” group to a primary “friends” group.

-Nadya

From Professional to Layman: Bridging the Communication Gap

For the best part of this week, my mother has been spending time in hospital. I have visited her a couple of times and found her to be alright, though very bored. On the last of these visits, I happened to walk in while the resident M.D., one Dr. Wong, was briefing my parents on her progress since the time she was warded. He struck me as being professional and businesslike, young though he was. Whether consciously or not, he managed to put us at our ease using the (in)famous “Physician’s bedside manner”, and I am writing today to attempt to explain how he did it, from a Communications point of view.

The professional has a couple of advantages over the layman: He knows the subject at hand much better, and perhaps because of that, can use logic and reasoning to bring his point across. On top of that, the layman would most likely be seeking advice, and would consequently be more amenable to change his viewpoint to suit the professional’s. These methods are known as authoritative and substantive reasoning.

Here’s how he did it:

1. Speaking in a calm and professional manner.

   The way the doctor spoke was in a brisk and concise manner, clearly elucidating the problem, what he and other excellent colleagues were doing about it, and how they were going to fix it. He did not beat about the bush, nor did he stutter in any way. Also, he stayed cool under a slew of questions asked, and, when a disagreement ensued, calmly explained why the medical team was doing what they were.

 2. Coming prepared to answer questions directly.

Instead of dealing with the inevitable questions by saying, “I’ll refer this to my superior, then I’ll get back to you,” the way I would have done (indeed, what most of us would have done), he answered them as directly as he could. Then again, since he was a doctor, he was probably given more discretionary powers than most of us would have been, especially since he’d have been trained to deal with just this kind of situation, and probably encountered the same things before. Yet this made him sound more professional and convincing, and he managed to bring him us around to something we were initially uncomfortable with.

 3. Maintaining eye contact; other non-verbal cues.

Finally, the doctor maintained eye contact with whomever he was talking to, even when someone asked a question or expressed a view he disagreed with. This would have projected an aura of sincerity and honesty, especially given the force of a dual-pronged argument utilising authoritative and substantive reasoning. He also leaned slightly forward when explaining things to us, and gestured slightly with his open hands when emphasising his point. What this did was it put us all at our ease. His body language basically said, “I’m trying to help you here, and I am not going to harm you in any way.” We as a race are programmed, I think, to interpret these gestures as friendly and sincere. Showing both hands was a sign that the other party was not carrying any weapons, and leaning forward and turning to face one’s questioner could actually have meant that he was putting himself at our mercy by exposing himself to attack. These, taken together, would have, and did, convey an attitude of humility and sincerity, though we all knew he knew best.

So there you have it: Dyadic public speaking in action. Do you have any other points I missed out? Have you had an experience to share? Feel free to do so below!

Also, I’m praying for her speedy recovery, but that’s beside the point, I think.

Edmund, from CGH.

Sir Winston Churchill

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Ria

As we study about public speeches, I was reminded of one of many great public speakers whose speeches have had much influence on many people – the  former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Sir Winston Churchill.

Sir Winston Churchill gave three great speeches in the first year of World War II, in 1940. The three speeches, in order of when it was given, “Blood, toil, tears and sweat”, “We shall fight on the beaches” and “This was their finest hour”, served as a motivational force to the people of the United Kingdom during the hardship and torment of war.

As communication chances may be limited in the chaotic times of war, Sir Winston Churchill’s speeches become vital channels of communication from him to the people. Not only does he have to inform them of the situation or state of the war, but at the same time, he has to motivate and give hope and courage to the people.

“Blood, Toil, Tears and Sweat” Speech

Here is an excerpt from this speech that, I think, is very powerful:

“You ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: It is victory, victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory, however long and hard the road may be; for without victory, there is no survival.”

Excerpt taken from: http://www.winstonchurchill.org/learn/speeches/speeches-of-winston-churchill/92-blood-toil-tears-and-sweat

In this speech, he repeated the word “victory”, in order to emphasize the importance of having victory for this war. His use of the absolute word “no survival”, again stresses the significance of victory. He adopted the use of pathos, as he tried to rouse strong emotions of patriotic amongst his countrymen by relating having victory to the people’s (including soldiers’) own survival. This is done, perhaps, in order to get the people’s support of the war and to motivate the soldiers during the war.

“We Shall Fight on the Beaches” Speech

Below is a transcript from the peroration (final part of the speech):

“Even though large tracts of Europe and many old and famous States have fallen or may fall into the grip of the Gestapo and all the odious apparatus of Nazi rule, we shall not flag or fail.

We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France,
we shall fight on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches,
we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this Island or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the British Fleet, would carry on the struggle, until, in God’s good time, the New World, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the old.”

Excerpt taken from: http://www.winstonchurchill.org/learn/speeches/speeches-of-winston-churchill/128-we-shall-fight-on-the-beaches

Again, he uses the repetition of “we shall…”. In this case, the effect is that he tries to motivate the people to do these, and by repeating the words “we shall”, he managed to invoke a sense of hope and possibility that they will and they can do all those things that was said. By stating all the possible places of war (landing grounds, streets, and even fields, hills and beaches), he motivates the listeners by giving a sense that everyone will try to fight against the enemies, and that they are all in this together; that feeling of unity, of togetherness, to bond together the nation during the disruptive times of war that may segregate the people and the nation. I think that it is amazing, how he manages to communicate so much in these few sentences, which I suppose is vital in times of war as communication channels may not always be readily available.

“This Was Their Finest Hour” Speech

Below is a transcript from his peroration:

“I expect that the Battle of Britain is about to begin. Upon this battle depends the survival of Christian civilization. Upon it depends our own British life, and the long continuity of our institutions and our Empire. The whole fury and might of the enemy must very soon be turned on us. Hitler knows that he will have to break us in this Island or lose the war. If we can stand up to him, all Europe may be free and the life of the world may move forward into broad, sunlit uplands.

But if we fail, then the whole world, including the United States, including all that we have known and cared for, will sink into the abyss of a new Dark Age made more sinister, and perhaps more protracted, by the lights of perverted science. Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves that, if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will still say, ‘This was their finest hour.’“

Excerpt taken from: http://www.winstonchurchill.org/learn/speeches/speeches-of-winston-churchill/1940-finest-hour/122-their-finest-hour

In here, he uses pathos as he tries to appeal to the emotions of the people.He brought up the subject of religion, mentioned in “survival of Christian civilization” – religion is something that is deeply rooted in the people’s beliefs and by appealing to their religion, he tries to rouse strong emotions from within the people’s hearts. Also, he uses strong negative words “sinister”, “perverted” so as to stress how dark and gloomy the world may be, if victory is not theirs. He also managed to motivate the people to keep holding on despite the effects of war, by saying how in a thousand years that time will be “their finest hour”, instilling the belief that they can and will overcome this ordeal, giving the people a sense of hope.

Finally…

After reading (and listening) to his speeches, I felt emotions stirred within me. Although there are parts (such as war facts) that may have had bore me, I find from these three speeches that his peroration always manage to rouse the listeners’ emotions and give them a sense of hope (in the bleakness of war). With no war and enemy to face, even I feel such strong feelings; I imagine that the soldiers too, when they heard these speeches, feel this way (or even more inspired).

Sexual innuendoes in advertising~

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Perry

Well before we get down to the mouth watering parts of the post, there are two things we should know first. Advertising is one of the many paths we can take in the future as communication majors, and the most important thing is that I really really really really really really really (I don’t need to say more right?) love to eat. =D

So when I think of advertisements and food, one particular fast food chain has never failed to amaze me in the ways they use sexual innuendoes combined extremely hot and busty women (Paris Hilton, Padma Lakshmi) in their posters and commercials. If you haven’t got it yet, (which I doubt unless you have been living under a rock, or just hate fast food in general) its none other than the American Char-grilled Burger Chain, Carl’s Jr.

Lets have a preview of one of their juicy commercials to set the mood =D

Watching this just makes the burger so much more tasty don’t you agree!?!?

To me, the main aim of an advertisement is to create awareness about the product and what better way to do that by objectifying extremely hot women in their commercials which will definitely stop any guy, if not anyone else in their tracks to take a second look. I mean honestly, anyone would stop and pay attention when they see an exquisite specimen of the human race. The use of suggestive themes is also another way that is used to attract the attention of the consumer by playing on their conservative nature. These themes get people talking and by doing that, they inadvertently help the company promote it’s product by word of mouth. With the aid of social media, I think even the cliché “spread like wildfire” is slowly becoming an understatement.

Some examples of over the top uses of suggestive contexts

Kim Kardashian

After watching this, I’m never going look at salad the same way again.

Kate Upton

It is beginning to border on the absurd… but to be brutally honest, I liked it.

We can argue all day that these commercials are just meant for the male population to objectify women in that perspective. I would like to believe that there may be a hidden message when they use these pretty women in their commercials. What if the other message that they would like to portray is that girls do not always need to worry about their weight and appearances and be able to enjoy a good hearty burger once in awhile. I would say it makes some logical sense…

Carl’s Jr. did not only do commercials of burgers and hot chicks, they also tried to personalize the lifestyle of eating their burgers by depicting guys misleading their girlfriends on because of the burger.

Steak Sandwich

Jalapeño Chicken Sandwich

Buffalo Chicken Sandwich

Due to the nature of these commercials and that some of these burgers never came to Singapore, they never saw the light of day in our oh so conservative country. If they did, I bet the Straits Times forum page will have some ungrateful people complaining about it, being overly serious about the suggestive themes.

While Carl’s Jr. did not air any commercials on TV in Singapore, they had their fair share of posters and sexual innuendo tag lines.

If you can’t see, it says: “Don’t blush… we’re showing some skin.”

There was the Thickburger ad where the tag line was “Some love it long, most love it thick”. I couldn’t find the picture but if you have walked by a Carl’s Jr. in Singapore, you would most definitely have seen it.

This is only my perception of how Carl’s Jr. focuses their advertising goals on and I believe there may be some finer points that I may have overlooked.

Using these styles of advertising did not go unnoticed amongst its competitors and there was one time when Burger King came out with this:

That’s one way to let your imagination run wild.

And on that bombshell, it its time to end. Thank you very much for reading, Goodbye!

Group Communication

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Ria

The importance of communication in a group cannot be further emphasized. Communication in a group can ‘make or break’ the group (although may be cliched, the truth of this statement is indisputable).

The lack of communication and miscommunication may create unnecessary troubles for the group, and hinder it from performing to the best of its potential. These things are possibly, also the cause of misunderstandings, and friction between the group members.

In order for the group to communicate and function properly, I believe that each member must put in the effort to try to accommodate to the other members, as he/she also tries to contribute ideas and state her own desires/needs. Sometimes, due to the contrasting or even opposing, nature and behaviour of the various group members, there may be an imbalance of the distribution of power amongst the members. For example, perhaps a more vocal or eloquent person has more say in the group as he/she is able to assert his/her own beliefs. More introverted members, may on the other hand, keep whatever is on their minds, to themselves, to the extent that perhaps that member may be disillusioned and feel as if the others do not want to accommodate to his/her ideas and needs, when this may not be the truth of the case.

Many other troubles may appear, perhaps as a result of differences in direction, beliefs and goals. Although not in a group, but no few actors/actresses have chosen to drop out of a movie, with the reason that he/she has differences with the director or the producer of the film. In order to solve these differences, I think communication is especially of importance. Not just any communication of course, but perhaps a quality, deep and engaging communication whereby the members would then try to resolve the problem by giving in or accommodate to the other members. Of course, this is the ideal solution. The reality is that, this may not be as easy as it seems. For with communication, comes the person’s own ideas, beliefs and desires of which all are deeply embedded within a person, making it difficult to change – as such, there is a need to open our eyes and try to be understanding with others, which again, is simpler said than done.

The Power Of Facebook

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Srishti

For this cause, Facebook is one of the means of communication being used. We all know that it(Facebook) is powerful. But how powerful, we shall find out by the end of this year. The ‘Stop KONY 2012’ page on Facebook got 17,000 likes in a very short span of time and this number in increasing at a fast pace. Facebook is a very great platform to communicate with people one knows and also does not know.Like many things, Facebook has its good points and bad points. I do not know if I can safely say that the good points overpower the bad ones but it definitely helps information spread from a part of the world to the other in a quick and cheap(free,actually) way.
Please take some time off and watch this video. Let us all help in whatever way we can to save the children in Uganda.

Getting the Point Across

Tags

Edmund, getting, point, singaporeans vs westerners, singlish vs english

I came across this table some time ago, and it’s recently resurfaced.

Scenario	Westerner	Singaporean
Saying “no” to a customer	I’m sorry, but we don’t seem to have what you want in your size but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.	No stock.
Returning a call	Hello, this is _________. Did anyone call for me a few moments ago?	Hello, you got call me annot?
Getting someone to make way for you	Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you please make way?	Ass-kew me.
Giving someone a treat	Hey! Put your wallet away, this drink is on me	(Dismissive wave) No need lah!
Asking for permission	Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?	(Pointing at door) Can annot?
Entertaining a first-time guest	Please, make yourself right at home. Don’t hesitate to let me know if you need anything at all.	No need shy shy one ah?
When doubting someone	I don’t recall you doing/saying ________ at any point at all.	Where got?
Verbal disagreement	Uh, (name), I’ll have to stop you there. I can see where you’re coming from, but I really need to disagree with you there.	Eh, you clay-zee (crazy) or what?!
When asking someone to lower his voice	Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice? I’m trying to concentrate over here.	Eh, shut up lah!
Assessing a tight situation	We seem to be in a lot of trouble here.	Die already lah!
When angry	Would you kindly leave me alone?	Fu*k you!

I don’t know whether it’s because we are a high-context culture and theirs is lower, or whether they are people-oriented as a culture than we are, but the fact is, Westerners spend much more time in composing their sentences than do Asians, not just Singaporeans in general. What do you think? Are you someone who tries to cut to the chase, or someone who believes in diplomacy and tact?

Interpersonal Communications

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Perry

The recent lesson on interpersonal communications got me thinking, and I realized that I could apply some of its concepts to the movies that I have watched.

The movie example that I would use would be Mr. and Mrs. Smith which opened in theaters in 2005. I believe almost everyone has seen that movie at least once but I’ll provide a short summary of it. John(Brad Pitt) and Jane (Angelina Jolie) Smith are a normal married couple living a normal life in a normal suburb, working normal jobs…well, if you can call secretly being assassins “normal”. But neither Jane nor John knows about their spouse’s secret, until they are surprised to find each other as targets! But on their quest to kill each other, they learn a lot more about each other than they ever did in their five (or six) years of marriage. (IMDB)

I shall begin by analyzing the beginning of their relationship using the relational stages:

• Initiation stage

They first met in Columbia when it was experiencing some civil unrest and inadvertently made use of each other to protect their respective secret identities.

• Experimenting stage

After that encounter, they shared a date and a dance together coupled with a lot of drinks.

• Intensifying/Integration stage

Within six weeks after returning from Columbia they were a couple and going on dates, e.g. at a theme park John proposed to Jane.

But after five (or six) years of marriage, their relationship showed signs of deterioration and they had to go to a marriage counsellor. Their relationship lost most of its novelty as their daily life became more of a routine, e.g. going to work together but in separate cars, coming home at a scheduled time for dinner.

• Differentiating stage

Their small argument about the color of their new curtains, John thought that they agreed to wait but Jane went ahead to make the decision. John wanted to return the curtains but Jane told him that he would get used to it. From this example, we can also see that Jane is the more dominating spouse.

When John bought the wrong kind of butter for Jane, because he did not pay attention to her words properly.

• Circumscribing stage

During one of the dinner scenes, John did not complain but used non verbal cues to display his unhappiness at the taste of the food by visibly adding a lot of salt on it. Jane wanted to say something about it but did not voice out her concerns.

• Stagnating stage

Eventually, a gap grew between their relationship, filled with all the things that they are unable to talk about. They engaged in simple small talks but it was very formal and scripted.

• Avoiding stage

When the question of intimacy was brought up at the marriage counsellor’s office, they struggled to give a straight reply. Implying that they have not been intimate with each other for quite some time.

The concept of face can also be applied to them. While facing the slow disintegration of their relationship, they portray the image of a happily married couple to their neighbors.

Of course as we already know, the story progresses and there was a forced disclosure and their real professions were revealed to each other and their lives were turned upside down.

Due to the love they had for each other, each of them were unable to kill the other despite being ordered to do so, hence their respective organizations placed a bounty on their heads and they had to run for their lives as assassins try to kill them.

While being chased by killers on the highway, they decided that this was the perfect time to do some self-disclosure. But they skipped most of the steps like appropriacy, and that it should be told gradually, as they felt that they could lose their lives at any moment.

There might have been some aspects of interpersonal communication that I have overlooked from the movie. I hope you have enjoyed my little presentation and better understood the concepts discussed here about interpersonal communications.

A Communication Challenge

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Edmund

Perhaps because it is perceived to be a taboo, or as being too hard to handle, or even perhaps as too dry a subject, not one in our Communication class has tried to tackle this topic before (or so I think) –  and that topic being: Communicating with an autistic person, or more specifically, a person with Asperger’s Syndrome Disorder (ASD).

Asperger’s syndrome is named after the Austrian pediatrician Hans Asperger who, in 1944, studied and described children in his practice who lacked non-verbal communication skills, demonstrated limited empathy with their peers, and were physically clumsy. Fifty years later, it was standardized as a diagnosis, but many questions remain about aspects of the disorder. (℅ wikipedia) But why I am doing this post is because, at some point in our lives, we will end up having to talk to, on at least a social level, to someone with this problem. How would you communicate with someone who has trouble reading non-verbal cues?

We would probably know by now that the majority of our communication takes place non-verbally. The quirk of an eyebrow, the impatient tapping of a foot, even a sigh of exasperation, are all signs of that, and they convey a world of meaning that would be very difficult, if not impossible, to put into words. Someone without the ability to read those cues would probably be liable to drone on and on about a particular subject, blissfully oblivious to the fact that the people around him have completely lost interest long ago.

And there’s more. Because the person suffering from this disorder also lacks the empathetic mindset, he will also find it very difficult to understand why people do not share the same perspective as he does, and may also become very self-centered at worst. So, you have yourself a self-centered person who won’t go away. How would you communicate with him?

Communicating With Our Parents

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Ria

 

Any problem, big or small, within a family, always seems to start
 with bad communication. Someone isn't listening.
-Emma Thompson

I’m sure we all have had our share of miscommunications and misunderstandings with our parents, some more than others and some lesser. The few most articulated reasons for such occurrences being, “My parents just do not understand me”, “It’s the generation gap”, “My parents are so busy”, “They do not care/love about me” – notice how in most, if not all, of the reasons the fault does not lie within us (the child)? Coincidence? I think not. Often we forget that communication is a two-way street; if such a parent-child communication fails, it is the fault of both parties involved, the parent and the child. As always, it is easy to blame it on anyone and anything else but ourselves.

Why do such miscommunications occur? Being the children of our parents, we live under one roof with our parents (except those unfortunate ones). We are physically near our parents, and yet at times, we may feel so verily distant from them. I believe the issue here lies in the lack of communication between the parents and their offspring. Most urban parents are so pre-occupied with their jobs that they do not have much time to set aside for their children. By no means am I implying that the entirety of the fault lies on this issue, though I will not deny it being one of the reasons why. Everyday conversations, no matter the frivolity, are important. It is because this forms the basis of parent-child communication, and will built a child’s confidence and trust in his/her parents, and also habituate a child to openly communicate with his/her parents, preventing him/her from venting up all those emotions inside him/herself and lessen the chances of misunderstandings from arising.

With more parent-child interaction, perhaps then we can depend more on our parents for emotional support, lower our chances of misbehaving (out of rebellion due to the lack of communication) and also lessen our dependency on ‘undesirable’ peer groups in our search for a place of comfort and acceptance. Also, frequent conversations make us feel (more) loved and cared about by our parents, even if we do not spend that much time doing activities together – provided that these are quality conversations, not just a mere yes/no question such as “Have you eaten?”, but more of a what/how/why question that gives the child a chance to explain and express his/her emotions such as “What did you do in school today?”. Especially at a stage whereby we are perhaps at our most emotionally-unstable phase, knowing that our parents love and care about us will boost our self-esteem and confidence, particularly at times when we feel as if “the world is against us” or “everything is going wrong”.

Talking may seem like such a simple task and yet, its importance should not be undermined. True, they may be just words, but words are powerful. Words can create or destroy worlds, make us feel better or worse. Communicating with our parents create not just a bridge of understanding, but also something much greater than that – it provides us with a haven, a home to return to (not just in a physical form). Being assured that we can find solace in our parents is, I think, one of the greatest gifts a parent can give to their child.